Not Over You
by BigMouth96
Summary: How Olivia feels about Elliot leaving. Sequel to "Nothing". SongFic: Not Over You by Gavin Degraw.


**The first time I heard this song, I thought this is how Olivia felt when Elliot left. (Such a sad thought :c) Anyways, this is like a sequel to "Nothing", but in Olivia's point of view and it happens during the same time.  
I recommend listening to the song when you read this :D  
The song belongs to Gavin Degraw.**

**Not Over You**

_Dreams, that's where I have to go  
To see your beautiful face, anymore  
I stare at a picture of you and listen to the radio  
Hope, hope there's a conversation_

I miss Elliot. He has been on leave for a while. He says he needs to think about things. What is there to think about? All he needs to do is come back.

Sometimes I dream of that day. I replay the events in my head to see if it could have ended any other way. It could have. He didn't need to kill that girl. But something was different last time. There was this look in his eye. The girl had pointed the gun at me. I could have defended myself, shot her in the arm or the leg, but Elliot took control. He was protecting me, like always. Like a good partner. I hope he comes back soon.

_Where we both admit we had it good  
But until then it's alienation, I know  
That much is understood  
And I realize_

Elliot is gone. Captain told me. Without so much as a goodbye. I miss him so much. He was my partner, my best friend, practically my only family. I love him more than anything, and now he's…gone. How could he do this to me? After all we've been through?

He haunts my dreams. I can't close my eyes anymore without seeing his face. I barely sleep anymore. Everyone knows something is wrong, but no one wants to say anything. It would only make things worse. I don't think I would even be able to admit it if one of them asked me, anyways.

I didn't realize how much I needed him. I should have told him.

_If you ask me how I'm doin I would say I'm doin just fine  
I would lie and say that you're not on my mind  
But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two  
And finally I'm forced to face the truth  
No matter what I say, I'm not over you_

Sometimes when I drive past the bar, I think of him. We always used to go there together. It was like our special place. We would go there together if we were angry, upset, happy, or just needed someone to talk to. But now, I'm alone. I know I still have friends at the 6-1, but it's not the same, they're not the same. They're not Elliot.

_Not over you_

Two new detectives were assigned to the squad. Amanda Rollins and Nick Amaro. They are nice, but it's not the same. The first time I heard Nick's voice, I thought it might have been Elliot's. I was excited. But it wasn't him. I was just going crazy. I need something to get him off of my mind.

_Damn, damn girl you do it well  
And I thought you were innocent  
You took this heart and put it through hell  
But still you're magnificent_

His name is David Haden. He works at the District Attorney's office. He's so nice and sweet and cute. And we have such a good time whenever we're together. He's a great distraction. I hardly think of Elliot anymore. Now Haden is what I think about. And it's great. I can concentrate on my work. I actually smile now.

_I, I'm a boomerang doesn't matter how you throw me  
Turn around and I'm back in the game  
Even better than the old me  
But I'm not even close without you_

I am sitting at my desk, Elliot across from me. We're talking just like old times. We both laugh. Munch is carrying on about some new conspiracy theory. Fin is shaking his head. I look around. Something is way too familiar. The girl walks in. She begins shooting. Then Elliot shoots her. I wake up, screaming, tears streaming down my face. Haden wakes up and embraces me, trying to calm me down. He tells me it was just a dream. I begin to cry.

_If you ask me how I'm doin I would say I'm doin just fine  
I would lie and say that you're not on my mind_

Haden and I are broken up now. No more him and me. Again, it's just me. Again, another guy I care about has left me. Yes, this is under different circumstances, but it still sucks. I realize I really do love him…

_But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two  
And finally I'm forced to face the truth.  
No matter what I say, I'm not over you_

Elliot comes into my dreams. I miss him so much, it hurts. I lie awake in my bed, unable to face my dreams. I've tried to call him, but he never answers. I've even gone to his old place. He moved. I have no way to get in contact with him. I need to hear his voice, to see his voice, to feel his touch..

_And if I had the chance to renew  
You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do  
I could get back on the right track  
But only if you'd be convinced  
So until then_

I wish he would walk back into my life, even if it was just for a day. I would cry and he would hug me and it would be just like old times…

I never leave my house, unless it's to go to work. I tried going to the bar with Alex, Munch, and Fin, but it made me even more depressed. I would look at Elliot's old seat right next to me.

How am I going to continue living like this?...

One Saturday night, I'm sitting alone in my apartment like usual. I begin to think about the nights like this when Elliot would bring over beer and we would call for pizza or Chinese food. Those were the days. My mind drifts off to times we spent together…

I wake up to hear my phone ringing. I answer it.

"Hello?" I answer.

"Hey Liv," the voice responded.

My heart races. Only one person calls me that this late. "Who's this?"

"Elliot."

I gasp.

"Well, I know it's been a long time but…" he begins

"How could you leave me? After all we've been through?" I begin crying. How could he do this to me?!

"I couldn't face you. I feel bad for what I did, but I didn't know what to say. I wanted to apologize for that. I'm sorry Liv. You still there?" He pauses. "I also have something else to tell you, but I don't exactly know how to tell you…well…I love you."

I hang up the phone. I can't believe him! If he loved me, he wouldn't have left me! What if he was serious? I sigh, pull myself together, and call him back. He doesn't answer, but I'm not surprised. If he would have hung up on me, I wouldn't answer either. I leave him a voicemail, "If you ask me how I'm doin, I would say I'm doin just fine. I would lie and say that you're not on my mind. But I go out and I sit down at a table set for two. And finally I'm forced to face the truth. No matter what I say, I'm not over you."

I hang up the phone and begin to cry.

_Not over you  
Not over you  
Not over you_

**Author's Note**

**What do you think? Should I do more stories like this?**


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